10 signs impostor syndrome is holding you back during menopause (And what to do)
Are you wondering if impostor syndrome is affecting your confidence or career during menopause? Discover the 10 common signs imposter syndrome is holding you back and practical strategies to break the cycle.
Picture this. Or, for some of you reading this, perhaps you don't have to imagine it because it's already your reality.
You get the promotion, land the client, or receive fantastic praise for your work. Instead of feeling proud and celebrating your achievements, a little voice inside tells you it was just luck, good timing, or simply because it was a team effort.
It whispers that, sooner or later, someone will realise you don't actually know what you're doing, and suddenly your self-doubt overshadows all the good feelings you should be able to enjoy.
If that sounds familiar, you're certainly not alone. In fact, it's something that comes up time and time again in our free menopause and mental health workshops.
Impostor syndrome affects people across every profession and stage of life, from students and entrepreneurs to CEOs and creatives. Research even suggests that up to 82% of people experience it at some point in their lives.
The good news? Feeling like an impostor doesn't mean you are one. More often than not, it simply means your inner critic has become louder than the evidence.
In this article, Victoria, the co-founder of MenoMinds, explores the 10 common signs that impostor syndrome may be holding you back and shares practical ways to recognise it, challenge it, and finally start embracing the praise and success you've worked so hard to earn.
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What actually is imposter syndrome?
Impostor syndrome is a psychological pattern where people doubt their abilities, talents, or achievements and worry they'll eventually be exposed as a "fraud" or an “imposter,” despite consistent, clear evidence that reveals their capability and success.
Imposter syndrome isn't a mental illness or formal diagnosis. Instead, it's a common experience that can affect anyone, regardless of their age, career, or level of success. Ironically, it’s suggested that it often affects the very people others see as confident and accomplished.
For the people navigating imposter syndrome, they struggle to internalise their successes, no matter how big or small, and they put success down to luck, timing, or other people's efforts rather than recognising their own abilities.
Impostor syndrome also tends to go hand in hand with perfectionism and exceptionally high personal standards. Many people feel they have to know everything in their profession, never make mistakes, always be switched on and working or constantly prove their worth to feel validated. As a result, even genuine achievements can feel undeserved, creating a cycle of self-doubt that becomes difficult to break.
The important thing to remember is this: feeling like an impostor doesn't mean you are one. More often than not, those feelings are simply a sign that your inner critic has become louder than the facts.
So, how do you know if impostor syndrome is quietly influencing your thoughts and impacting your confidence? Here are 10 signs to look out for next time.
1. You put your success or positive feedback down to luck
When something goes well, do you find yourself saying, "I was just lucky," or "Anyone could have done that"?
People experiencing impostor syndrome often struggle to internalise their achievements, blaming them on timing, chance, or other people's support rather than their own abilities. Over time, this does a lot more harm than good and can make genuine accomplishments feel undeserved.
What to do: Start keeping an "evidence folder" of positive feedback, achievements, and milestones. When self-doubt creeps in, open the folder and let the facts speak louder than your inner critic. This is a fantastic way to reaffirm how amazing you are and that the work you do is important. Even screenshots of text messages, emails, social media comments, and transcriptions from calls all count.
2. You're constantly worried someone ‘will find you out’
Even after years of experience, you might feel as though you're one mistake away from everyone discovering you're not as capable as they think..
This fear of being "found out" is one of the main hallmarks of impostor syndrome and can create constant anxiety, particularly in high-pressure environments in the workplace.
What to do: Ask yourself what evidence actually supports that fear. More often than not, you'll realise it's based on feelings rather than facts.
3. You set unrealistic standards for yourself
Do you feel like anything less than perfect is failure?
Perfectionism and impostor syndrome often go hand in hand. You may delay starting projects and procrastinate, overwork yourself and feel burnt out, or never feel fully satisfied with what you've achieved because your expectations are almost impossible to meet.
What to do: Aim for progress rather than perfection. Done is often better than perfect. Breaking free from perfectionism takes time, so be patient with yourself. Set healthy boundaries, just as you would with other people. Establish clear working hours, stick to a routine, and create realistic to-do lists that support productivity without leading to burnout.
4. You don’t ever accept compliments
When someone praises your work, do you immediately downplay it or quickly change the conversation?
You might say, "It wasn't just me," or "It wasn't that difficult,” or “Don’t be silly, it wasn’t that good.”
While humility is a wonderful quality, constantly dismissing positive feedback can reinforce the belief that you haven't genuinely earned your success and that you aren’t deserving of positive feedback.
What to do: The next time someone compliments you, simply say, "Thank you." Resist the urge to minimise your contribution or explain away your success. Accepting praise doesn't make you boastful; it allows you to acknowledge your own efforts and achievements. In fact, accepting a compliment is often kinder than dismissing someone else's genuine appreciation.
5. You think you need to know everything before you take action
Whether it's applying for a promotion, launching a business, or starting a seemingly normal task, you convince yourself you need one more qualification, one more course, or a little more experience.
The truth is, nobody knows everything, and if they did, life would be incredibly boring. There is real strength in staying curious, continuing to learn, and accepting that you don't have all the answers. In fact, people often respect and admire those who are open to asking questions and seeking support when they need it. Sometimes asking for help gets you one step closer to where you need to be rather than procrastinating in isolation.
What to do: Remember that confidence usually follows action, not the other way around.
6. You compare yourself to everyone else
It's easy to look at colleagues, friends, or people on social media and assume they've got it all figured out. Meanwhile, you're painfully aware of your own doubts and insecurities.
The problem is that you're comparing your behind-the-scenes reality to everyone else's highlight reel. Remember, most people only share the parts of their lives they feel comfortable revealing. What you see is often a carefully selected moment, a tiny percentage of what really goes on behind closed doors.
What to do: Focus on your own progress rather than someone else's journey.
7. Asking for help feels like admitting failure
Very similar to the point above, if you believe you should be able to do everything on your own, you may avoid asking for support, even when you're overwhelmed and need support.
Many people with impostor syndrome see asking for help as a sign of weakness, when in reality it's often a sign of self-awareness and strength.
What to do: Start small. Ask one question or delegate one task this week.
8. Your inner critic is loud and overpowers all of your thoughts
Do you catch yourself thinking:
"I'm not good enough."
"I'm going to mess this up."
"Everyone else is better than me."
“I’m going to fail, what’s the point?”
These automatic negative thoughts can become so familiar that they start to feel like facts and can consume your whole day.
What to do: Try challenging these thoughts. Ask yourself, "Would I say this to a friend?" If not, why are you saying it to yourself?
9. You see mistakes as proof that you’re not good enough
Everyone makes mistakes, but if you have impostor syndrome, one setback can feel like proof that you were never good enough in the first place. One mistake can completely derail your confidence, leaving you second-guessing yourself and carrying that doubt into every task or decision that follows.
In reality, failure isn't evidence that you don't belong; it's often evidence that you're growing, you’re human, and you’re learning.
What to do: Instead of asking, "Why did I fail?" ask, "What can I learn from this?"
10. You’re exhausted from constantly trying to prove yourself
One of the biggest signs that impostor syndrome is holding you back is that you're always striving but rarely allowing yourself to truly acknowledge or celebrate your achievements. Instead of pausing to appreciate a milestone, you move the goalposts and focus on the next challenge.
You say yes when you want to say no. You over prepare, work longer hours than necessary, and push yourself to constantly prove your worth, even though you've already done more than enough.
Over time, this cycle can take its toll, leading to increased stress, anxiety, and eventually, burnout.
What to do: Practice self-compassion. Remind yourself that your value isn't determined by constant achievement, and that you deserve the same kindness you would offer someone else. Even having post-it note reminders around your workspace can be a great way to reaffirm self-compassion.
If you've found yourself nodding along to several of these signs, don't worry. Impostor syndrome isn't a personality flaw, and it certainly isn't a reflection of your ability. With awareness and a few simple mindset shifts, you can start to quieten that inner critic and build a healthier relationship with success.
One bonus tip from Victoria: Daily self-reflection journal
We love practical tips you can put into action straight away because there's no better feeling than taking proactive steps towards positive change.
At the end of each day, before you close your laptop and mentally switch off from work, set aside just ten minutes to reflect. Whether it's on a Post-it note, in the notes app on your phone, or in a handwritten journal, take a moment to check in with yourself.
Ask yourself:
What emotions did I experience today?
What triggered those emotions?
How did I respond?
What can I learn from this?
How would I speak to a friend?
Explore more techniques and tips in our free workshop
If reading this article has made you realise just how much impostor syndrome is affecting your confidence, you're not alone. It's one of the most common topics we explore in our workplace wellbeing sessions.
This July, Victoria will be running a free dedicated workshop on overcoming impostor syndrome, sharing practical tools and techniques to help you quieten your inner critic and build a healthier relationship with self-achievements.
Find out more and book your place below.
Important note:
We are not clinicians and cannot diagnose depression or other mental health conditions. If you’re having thoughts of harming yourself, or you feel like you can’t keep yourself safe, seek urgent help. Contact NHS urgent services, your GP, or a crisis service such as SHOUT (text 85258 in the UK). If you’re in immediate danger, call 999.
Seeking support
If symptoms persist, worsen, or begin to feel overwhelming, it is important to seek professional support. Speaking to your GP can be a helpful first step in understanding what you are experiencing and exploring treatment or support options. We also recognise that not all women feel ready to take this step, or may have had previous experiences that make this difficult.
If you ever feel unable to keep yourself safe, or you are experiencing thoughts of self-harm or suicide, please seek urgent help. You can contact your GP, call NHS 111, or reach out to Samaritans on 116 123 (free, 24/7) or jo@samaritans.org. If you are in immediate danger, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E.
